Beta Draconis Media

Beta Draconis is the primary source of media in the Draconis Sector. The most publicized media is often absurd, hedonistic, and sometimes even requires the death of some or all of its participants, but in truth, productions span across all genres. The pop culture of Beta Draconis has become the de facto pop culture of the rest of the region.

Name Gender Profession Notes
Blam! Princess F Actress, Singer Electrobeat Harmonics
Boris Ironsteel M Actor
Rave Machine M Ex-murderballer, Porn Star Suspended for investigation
Lapis Lazuli F Porn Star, Actress
Maximum Fatality M Murderballer
Chica-Chica F Singer Electrobeat Pop (deceased)
Dæmon Queen F Singer Black Opera Metal
Yam Geese Director
Havish Achingham M Director

The following are excerpts from News and Events that pertain to Beta Draconis media. The most recent is at the bottom, and the oldest is at the top.

CHICA-CHICA DIES IN HORRIFIC AEROPLANE INCIDENT

On her way to the Concert LaGrand, the beloved Beta Draconis pop singer’s aeroplane suffered catastrophic failure and went down over the ocean. Chica-Chica’s body has not yet been recovered. Black Opera Metal singer Dæmon Queen says “She [expletive deleted] had it coming, the [expletive deleted].” Dæmon Queen is currently under investigation by Draconis officials.

HOLOMOVIE DEBUTS

The holomovie “Badass Tornado Paratroopers” debuted on Beta Draconis yesterday to generally positive reviews and unprecedented box office gross, making it currently the 8th highest grossing movie in Draconis cinema and climbing rapidly on the charts. Boris IronSteel and Blam! Princess starred in the film with the renowned Gam Yeese as the director. Blam! Princess once again denied allegations of an affair with the late Chica-Chica.

DÆMON QUEEN FOUND INNOCENT

Dæmon Queen was acquitted of all charges yesterday afternoon after a fair trial on Beta Draconis and Chica-Chica’s aeroplane crash was established as not sabotage, but fault with the manufacturer. Her sales have exploded since Chica-Chica’s death, and she recently announced a new tour, “A Symphony of Exploitation and Agony,” that will make circuits in the Blame system. Vice-President Marshall from Blame, an avid fan, says he will be attending.

SPORTS CHAMPION ACCUSED OF CYBER ENHANCEMENT

The popular leader of the Bad Marines Team, Rave Machine, has been accused of using cybernetic implants to enhance his performance. The team has been censured and removed from the 3200 rosters and Rave Machine has been placed under investigation. Murderball fans are enraged and several riots have occurred in both Alpha and Beta Draconis, with angry mobs for both sides taking to the street. The death toll for the riots is 7 and counting.

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW: BLAM! PRINCESS

The beloved actor and totally hardcore star of Badass Tornado Paratroopers tearfully revealed in an exclusive interview yesterday all the sordid details of her lengthy, abusive, lesbian affair with Chica-Chica, and how Chica-Chica’s last communication was a sobbing apology message left for Blam! Princess, and how she was on her way to Blam! Princess’ home to make amends for all the previous wrongs when her aeroplane was sabotaged.

MURDERBALL INTERCONTINENTAL ROSTER ANNOUNCED

In the last match of the Small Season, the Gore Lords defeated the Krazy Kannibal Klan with a record 21 fatalities, including 3 audience members, and fully exterminated the entire opposing team. The Gore Lords make the intercontinental roster as well as a new historical record. The murderball magazine ‘Guts and Glory’ said about the game: “That was the most badass fucking thing I’ve ever seen and [the Gore Lords leader] Maximum Fatality is going to be a star this year.” Analysts predict that this season will be one of the most bloody since the foundation of the sport 99 years ago.

BETA DRACONIS PORN STARS STARRING IN NEW MOVIE

The renowned director Gam Yeese has announced he is collaborating with the director Havish Achingham for a new movie coming out next year. The movie, called “Karate King” is starring murderball champion and porn star Rave Machine as well as porn star Lapis Lazuli. It’s expected to be “the sexiest, bloodiest, most badass movie of the decade.”

INTERCONTINENTAL MURDERBALL GAMES KICK OFF

The teams Brawling Bastards and Probably Already Raining faced off each other in the first game of the intercon season. The Brawling Bastards surrendered after the third day of being cut off from food, water, and ammunition supplies and dropped out of the roster due to lingering health issues among the surviving members. Probably Already Raining had a dirty victory and sustained heavy losses, but is still in the game.

EXCITING MURDERBALL GAME REVEALS A NEW CONTENDER

The up-and-coming rookie Murderball team, Guinevere Did Nothing Wrong, defeated the longstanding team Literal Human Filth—holder of 3 world championship cups—so severely that the latter team does not have enough position replacements to continue for the season, and is dropping out for the year. Enraged Literal Human Filth fans rioted earlier today, burning a government court building, three residential homes, and a homeless shelter, resulting in 12 deaths and 43 injuries.

SPARKS LEAD ACTRESS IN TV SHOW PREMIER

The highly anticipated premier of the historical fiction TV show ‘The Senator’ debuted in the exclusive Archangel Theatre to a select audience last night before being released to the public online at midnight. The TV show, which Sparks is playing lead on, follows the tumultuous story of outspoken Senator Anne Thundergoode during the Gatria War, who came to oppose Alpha-D military actions and later the entire admiralty structure, and was eventually unlawfully executed as a result by the Drop-General Marshall, nearly sparking a revolution due to her massive popularity.

NARROW MURDERBALL VICTORY ENTHRALLS CROWDS

The Murderball team 360 Degrees of Anarchy defeated Bitchslap during yesterday’s battle royale at the legendary arena, Human Occupied Landfill. The audience was riveted as 360 fell massively behind in points and surviving team members when they decided to ritualistically sacrifice their team leader in the geographical center of the arena, despite the team leader’s vocal protests to being ritualistically sacrifices in the geographical center of the arena. This stunning move earned just enough points for 360 Degrees of Anarchy to spin 360 degrees and win.

MURDERBALL CHAMPION ANNOUNCED

In the final match of the season, the Gore Lords and Guinevere Did Nothing Wrong faced each other down for a record seven days of overtime. By the end of the game, food, water, and ammunition were completely out, several members of GDNW had broken out of the arena and fled into the neighborhood, and Maximum Fatality finished the match by personally strangling the three escaped GDNW team members with his bare hands. Judges ruled it “out of bounds,” and the Gore Lords were disqualified. Since there are no surviving GDNW members to give the Murderball trophy to, it will not be awarded this year.

ASTRA ALLURE RELEASES NEW ALBUM

The young, hot, new Beta-D pop star, Astra Allure, noted for her predilection for Astral Alacrity and interstellar free trader culture, has release a hit new album with the title “The Stars Align”. This included a song decrying the current war between the Draconis Empire and Astral Alacrity. Astra Allure has been placed under house arrest and is under investigation for seditious activities, despite protests from Beta-D civilians.

Beta Draconis Media

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